How do healthy relationships feel?

It is a challenging time for relationships all around but in this video I talk about how a healthy relationship should feel. We all deserve to have healthy relationships in our lives no matter virtually or in real life. If you want more content be sure to visit my patreon and become a patron today! www.patreon.com/drliz

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Hi, everyone! It’s Dr. Liz and I am here today talking to you about what it’s like when you are
actually in a healthy relationship.

Let me start by saying that I am a person who loves love. I am deeply romantic. I love dating. I
love sex, like I am here for all of it. I love dating.

However, because of my upbringing and stuff that I experience when I was growing up, I learned
a lot of really toxic ideas about what love should look and feel like. For me, when I was growing
up, I had a parent who I was really scared of a lot of the time. And I think that part of that taught
me that love feels like fear, that when love is important, you’re going to feel scared and that’s
how you know it’s love.

And as a result, a lot of the dating that I did in my 20s and my first half of my 30s was with
people who I felt unsafe with. I think that for some of us, that like butterflies in the stomach
feeling that we get is our body sensing danger. It is our body sensing that this person is not safe
for us. But we have all been told that it’s a sign that we really like them, that it’s excitement,
right? That those butterflies are a good sign.

Over the past couple of years, I’ve been unpacking a lot of my own patterns about what it is I
look for in relationships and coming to terms with the fact that a lot of what I’ve been drawn to
has been rollercoaster feelings that I want to feel the big rushes and the huge desire and the
danger and the fear, and realizing that that’s not great for me in the long term. That’s fun for a
kink scene. It’s fun for a few dates. It’s not great for someone who I want to build something
stable and long-term with.

Get the full transcript on my website: bit.ly/healthyrelationshipsvid

View it on YouTube